How to Use Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

Содержание
  1. Using Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship: Best Tips
  2. What Are Words of Affirmation?
  3. Words of Affirmation: Is it Your Love Language?
  4. How to Use Words of Affirmation
  5. Be Genuine
  6. Keep it Positive
  7. Get Creative
  8. Use Them Often
  9. Examples You Can Use for Inspiration
  10. Giving Compliments
  11. Expressing Gratitude
  12. Offering Encouragement and Support
  13. Final Thoughts
  14. What to Remember When Using Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship
  15. What are words of affirmation?
  16. How to Use Words of Affirmation 
  17. Be genuine 
  18. Say “I love you” often
  19. Express it in writing
  20. Choose your words wisely
  21. Know the words that speak the most to your partner
  22. Be creative
  23. Show empathy
  24. Notice the little things
  25. What to Avoid If Your Partner’s Love Language is Words of Affirmation
  26. How Counseling or Online Therapy Can Help
  27. The Best Way to Speak to a Partner Whose Love Language Is Words of Affirmation
  28. 01. Humility
  29. Examples of words of humility:
  30. 02. Gratitude & Appreciation
  31. Examples of words of appreciation:
  32. 03. Encouragement
  33. Examples of words of encouragement:
  34. 04. Empathy
  35. Examples of words of empathy:
  36. 05. Respect & Admiration
  37. Examples of words of respect:
  38. Ways to Use Words of Affirmation
  39. What are Words of Affirmation?
  40. Is Your Partner’s Love Language Words of Affirmation?
  41. Why Do Some People Need Words of Affirmation?
  42. Ways to Show Words of Affirmation
  43. Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With Your Partner
  44. Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With a Friend 
  45. Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With a Family Member
  46. Ways to Use Words of Affirmation In the Workplace

Using Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship: Best Tips

How to Use Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

Learn how to use words of affirmation to take your relationship to the next level. Master this love language with our top tips, advice, and examples.

Dr. Gary Chapman's bestselling book, The 5 Love Languages, has helped millions of readers discover their love languages, one of which is words of affirmation.

Understanding these love languages and how to use them can empower couples, as it allows them to express and receive love in ways that strengthen their relationship. It's all about meeting each other's needs through effective communication.

If you or your partner's love language is words of affirmation, or you’d to give them a try, then these tips will cover everything you need to know.

By learning about words of affirmation, you can use the power of spoken and written words to elevate the feelings of love and affection in your relationship. Also, you can find out how online therapy can help you improve your relationships.

What Are Words of Affirmation?

Words of affirmation are all about showing your partner how much you love, care, and appreciate them, either by saying it or writing them a message.

Essentially, they're positive words and phrases used to uplift, support, and show your love for your partner. Not everybody's love language is words of affirmation, but words mean a lot and have a powerful effect on those it is.

Using words of affirmation could be as simple as telling your partner how attractive they look or encouraging them before work, but the remarks must always be genuine.

You should also be aware that when someone's love language is words of affirmation, they also tend to be more sensitive to negative comments or criticism. So, be mindful and choose your words wisely!

Words of Affirmation: Is it Your Love Language?

According to Dr. Chapman's theory, the five love languages are: receiving gifts, quality time, words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch.

Of these, each person will have one or two primary love languages.

So that begs the question, how can you tell if words of affirmation is one of yours? How can you know if it’s your partner's love language?

Well, if you or your partner answer yes to most of the questions below, there's a good chance it could be:

  1. Are spontaneous, loving text messages more meaningful to you than hugs and kisses?

  2. Does being told «I love you» make your heart melt more than a thoughtful gift?

  3. Do genuine compliments mean more to you than helpful, caring actions?

  4. Is verbal encouragement and support from a loved one more significant to you than spending quality time together?

Overall, it's just about experimenting and figuring out which types of expression are most meaningful and bring the most joy.

And even if words of affirmation is not one of your main love languages, most people still appreciate thoughtful remarks and genuine compliments.

How to Use Words of Affirmation

So, you either know words of affirmation is one of your partner's love languages, or you want to try them to find out. But, you're a bit unsure how to use them, or maybe you’re afraid because words don't always come naturally to you.

Well, fear not, as the tips below will help ensure your words of affirmation always come across the right way:

Be Genuine

Words of affirmation only count when you mean them. When moments arise where you genuinely feel positive towards your partner in some way, let them know, don't let the opportunities pass.

If you think your partner's outfit looks great, say it; if you appreciate something they did, tell them. When you say things from the heart, they will naturally come off well.

Keep it Positive

Sure, we all have flaws, and we all make mistakes, but criticizing your partner too much will only knock their confidence.

Use your words of affirmation to uplift your partner, highlight their strengths, be empathetic, and celebrate everything you love about them. This raises their self-esteem and provides a needed boost when they're feeling down.

Get Creative

Words of affirmation don't always have to be spoken. Send a spontaneous text message to show your love, leave a sweet note somewhere to be discovered, or write them a poem; there are plenty of creative ways to deliver your words of affirmation.

Don't also forget to give compliments in front of others. Publicly displaying your support is sure to warm their hearts and shows you've got their back.

Use Them Often

If words of affirmation is your partner's love language, using them once per week just isn't going to be enough to fill their appetite.

Instead, it would be best if you aimed to use them daily. Don't worry. They're not going to grow tired of hearing you, especially if you can find fun and creative ways to express your love.

Examples You Can Use for Inspiration

Now, words of affirmation must always be personalized and genuine, so repeating from a script just won’t do.

That said, writing down some ideas you have or taking inspiration from some of ours can still help you get in the right state of mind, ready to seize opportunities when they come.

Below we’ve listed some examples for different types of words of affirmation you can use for inspiration.

Giving Compliments

Compliments will make your partner feel good, and they'll want to spend more time with you. Giving genuine compliments requires you to notice the good in your partner, which also helps you become a more positive person.

Not sure how to give a compliment? Here are a few ideas:

  • «Is that a new outfit? Damn, you look gorgeous!»
  • «Your mind is as sexy as your body.»
  • «I miss your smile; I can't wait to see you again soon.»

Expressing Gratitude

Words of affirmation are an excellent way to show your appreciation for your partner. Expressing gratitude is a win-win situation; it uplifts your partner, strengthens your bond, improves intimacy, and even improves your well-being.

Here are some examples:

  • “You always make me feel good, even on bad days; I really appreciate that.”
  • “Thank you for being such a great mom/dad to our kids and a caring partner.”
  • “Every day, I laugh when I'm with you. I'm grateful for that.”

Offering Encouragement and Support

Nobody thrives on negative criticism, especially those whose love language is words of affirmation. Choose your words carefully, be cheerful and kind as much as you can, and offer plenty of encouragement.

Here are a few examples to get you going:

  • «That was great; you've got this, go get 'em, tiger!»
  • «Every day, I'm inspired by what you're doing. Keep going; I'm here rooting for you!»
  • «I know it's going to be tough over the next few weeks, but we have each other. We'll get through this; you have my full support.»

Final Thoughts

When used right, words of affirmation can help you create an even stronger relationship, especially when it’s one of your love languages.

Hopefully, the tips and advice in this article have given you plenty of ideas and inspiration. All that’s left now is for you and your partner to try them!

If you’d to speak with someone one-on-one about relationship issues, Calmerry online counselors are always ready to give professional, helpful advice when you need it.

Kate Skurat has a B.S. in Psychology and an M.A. in Clinical Psychology from Pepperdine University and has been working in healthcare since 2017. She mainly treated depression, anxiety, eating disorders, trauma, grief, identity, relationship, and adjustment issues. Her clinical experience is focused on individual and group counseling.

Follow Kate here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kate-skurat-5348381b9/

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Источник: https://www.novinite.com/articles/209696/Using+Words+of+Affirmation+in+Your+Relationship%3A+Best+Tips

What to Remember When Using Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

How to Use Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

Everyone has a different way of expressing and receiving love. While some equate this feeling with spending time together, others prefer physical touch or receiving gifts. Some people, meanwhile, it when their partner offers help in any way they can or showers them with compliments or words of encouragement.

The concept described above is referred to as love language, developed by author and pastor Gary Chapman, Ph.D. According to him, there are 5 love languages, which define the way we show and receive love from other people. Although all of us can relate to most of these languages, it is ly that there’s one that will stand out or speak to us the most. These include:

  • Words of affirmation – written or spoken compliments that show love, affection, and appreciation.
  • Physical touch – non-verbal communication or the use of physical touch to show love.
  • Quality time – spending focused and uninterrupted time together.
  • Receiving gifts – being thoughtful or giving gifts, surprises, or tokens of love to their partner.
  • Acts of service – providing help/support to ease stress or burden of responsibilities.

“Words of affirmation” is one of the most common primary love languages. If this is your partner’s love language, it only means they get a thrill when you pay them with compliments or say words of encouragement. Telling your significant other “I love you” on a regular basis or congratulating them for a job well done is one example of using words of affirmation.

What are words of affirmation?

Words of affirmation focus on verbal expressions or expressing emotions through spoken or written words. As previously mentioned, those who have this as their love language feel the love and appreciation of their partner when they shower them with compliments, as well as acknowledge their work and effort.

Here are a few examples of words of affirmation:

  • I love you.
  • You mean so much to me.
  • I am so proud of you.
  • That new outfit looks great on you.
  • I am always here if you need help.
  • I feel lucky/blessed to have you in my life.
  • I feel loved/appreciated when you…
  • Thank you for…
  • I admire how you…

While words may not carry enough weight to some people, those whose love language is this find meaning and value to spoken and written words. This is also the reason why negative and critical comments can hurt them more. As these people value words a lot, harsh criticisms can be particularly painful for them.

How to Use Words of Affirmation 

If this is your partner’s love language and you’re not so great with words, you can always practice. Choosing your words carefully and searching deep in your heart why you love and care for your significant other can help. Here are a few things to remember when using words of affirmation in your relationship.

Be genuine 

Authenticity is the key when expressing your emotions. If your partner’s primary language is words of affirmation, know that they value the intentions and feelings behind your words.

It is also ly that they’ll be able to tell if you’re faking it or just saying things to them.

Back your words with genuine feelings and be specific when paying a compliment or expressing your love and affection.

Avoid shortcuts or rushed compliments. Saying “You’re lovely, can we go now?” can come off as dishonest and insincere.

Say “I love you” often

Gesture matters, but for those who gravitate towards words of affirmation, saying “I love you” often is greatly appreciated. It reaffirms that you have a strong and positive relationship and it makes your significant other feel good. Letting someone know you love them can also demonstrate intimacy and vulnerability between two people.

There are several ways to say “I love you” without actually muttering these three words. These include:

  • I am yours.
  • You are my favorite person.
  • You complete me.
  • You bring happiness to my life.

Do take note that even simple phrases can also mean “I love you”. Saying  “I am sorry” could also indicate the same thing, as this means that you take responsibility for your action and want to make things right. The same can also be true for saying “have a great day” and “take care”.

Express it in writing

If you find it hard to say what you feel face-to-face, consider writing a highly personalized message. Do take note that your partner or significant other will appreciate it more if you craft your own words instead of quoting a movie or copying something online. They will find it more special and romantic if the message comes from your heart.

Choose your words wisely

People with this love language value words a lot and can be overly sensitive to negative comments. This is why you need to be careful about your choice of words and the way you say them.

Think before you speak and avoid being too critical or condescending.

If you feel the need to say something constructive ( criticisms), try to squeeze in some compliments to make your feedback less hurtful.

Know the words that speak the most to your partner

Find the words or phrases that your significant other loves hearing the most. While some prefer compliments or words of encouragement on a daily basis, there are also those who love phrases that acknowledge their work and effort. Just be sure to tailor your words or message so they feel personal and well-thought-out. Being too generic or vague can come off as fake and insincere.

It can also be helpful to create a list, especially if you feel you don’t have a way with words. Listen and search for affirming words and customize them to fit the situation or your partner. This can help increase your vocabulary and allow you to come up with something new, fun, and creative when the situation demands it.

Be creative

Instead of just saying nice things plainly, think outside the box or find creative ways to communicate your love. You can try sending them an unexpected text saying you were thinking of them or leaving random love notes inside the house. You can also write them a song or put together a customized playlist or give them a pep talk before a big presentation at work.

Show empathy

This is particularly helpful when your partner is feeling down. Recognize how they are feeling and try to picture yourself in their shoes to understand things from their perspective. It is also important to be empathetic while acknowledging and validating their emotions. Show care and concern when they tell you their problems and let them know you have their back whatever happens.

Notice the little things

Don’t just mention or compliment the obvious things. Recognize and acknowledge the little ones or those that are usually taken for granted. Take note that people who have this as their primary love language also tend to notice and remember details in other people’s lives. Doing the same for them can make them feel important and loved.

What to Avoid If Your Partner’s Love Language is Words of Affirmation

Since words mean so much to people who have this as their primary love language, be sure to avoid harsh or highly sensitive and negative comments. Here are a few other things to avoid if your significant other’s love language is words of affirmation.

  • Don’t give fake affirmations. They can do more harm than good.
  • Don’t just copy-paste words or phrases. Make them personal or adapt them to the situation or your partner’s preferences.
  • Don’t make compliments for the sake of saying or making them. State your reasons and be sincere.
  • Don’t disregard your tone or mindlessly say things. Say words you mean them.
  • Don’t just assume they know that you love and appreciate them. Tell them through spoken or written words.

How Counseling or Online Therapy Can Help

If you’re having a hard time expressing your feelings or understanding your partner’s love language, help is always available. Consider online therapy or getting relationship counseling. Talking to a licensed mental health professional can help you navigate your emotions and learn effective strategies for creating a strong bond with your partner.

Online therapy can also help you learn more about not just your partner’s love language, but also yours. This can help both of you put them into practice, which can then improve your relationship. Online therapy, furthermore, offers a safe space to talk about your issues about love and explore your concerns surrounding this emotion and your relationship.

Show your partner that they’re loved and appreciated using their love language. Get support or seek online therapy if you need to. Do take note that the right resources and professional guidance can help you express your love better and build a healthy relationship.

Источник: https://calmerry.com/blog/relationships/words-of-affirmation/

The Best Way to Speak to a Partner Whose Love Language Is Words of Affirmation

How to Use Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

Photo Credit: The Kitcheners

Several years ago when my husband was just my fiancé, we took a marriage prep class. Newly engaged, we needed all the help we could get to prepare us for a lifetime of good and bad.

Sure, we had already decided to commit to each other for the rest of our lives, but we knew that there were things we could still learn about how to navigate our relationship.

 So when our marriage prep teacher Pete McFadden assigned The Five Love Languages for coursework, we jumped on it.

If you have not read Gary Chapman’s book, you’re missing out. Chapman’s bestselling book has sold more than ten million copies worldwide. It’s no wonder why—these two hundred pages have transformed countless relationships, including my own.

In his book, Chapman explains that we tend to give and receive love in five main ways: words of affirmation, quality time, gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

 My then-fiancé and I devoured our copies in a day, discussing our love languages afterward over takeout in my tiny living room. He couldn’t decide between physical touch and quality time (it turned out to be both).

Mine was a clear winner: words of affirmation.

What Chapman’s book taught us—and what it teaches most people, I suspect—is that love isn’t always communicated in a way that the recipient responds best to. The reason for this is that couples rarely share the same love language.

My husband, for example, tries to show me he loves me with bear hugs and by dancing with me in the kitchen. I’m sad to admit that cuddling is just not my thing. At the same time, I’ve tried to show my husband how much I love him through countless acts of service.

I cook every single meal and ensure the house is spotless before he’s home. But because his primary love language is not acts of service, these efforts are often lost on him. Yes, he appreciates my gestures.

But whether the dishes are clean or the floors are shining do not reflect how loved he feels. He feels most cherished with a simple face rub just before bed.

For me, I feel safest when I hear how he thinks and feels about me. The words “I love you” warm my heart. But hearing why he loves me? That sends me straight to heaven. Conversely, rudeness, insults, and even a brusque tone deeply injure those whose love language is words of affirmation.

Four years, three big moves, and two kids later, my husband has gotten pretty good at filling my love bucket with words of affirmation. The journey hasn’t been without its challenges for either of us.

He used to think that a text message a day from him would be enough (and I used to think he should be happy with a hug as he walks through the front door!).

But through trial and error, we’ve mastered each other’s love language.

As Chapman explains in his book, everyone appreciates receiving all of the love languages. Even if your partner’s primary love language isn’t words of affirmation, you can benefit from these skills.

 It’s not just about letters, text messages, phone calls, or emails here and there. It’s not about filling our days with deep conversations either. It’s as much the content of what you say as how you say it.

 For words of affirmation to have any impact, it’s necessary to put time, thought, and yes, love, into them.

Here are a few powerful themes that run through my husband’s words to me. If you are looking for more meaningful ways to express your feelings to the one you love, use these to help. And for once, your words might actually speak louder than your actions.

01. Humility

Every night, we go through a ritual that we to call “Three Things.” We tell each other (1) what we regret doing (or not doing) that day (2) what we’re thankful for and (3) how we know the other person is “the one.

” My husband and I both have huge egos, so it’s nice for us to have a safe space at the end of the day to acknowledge any mistakes we’ve made toward each other. We lay down our imperfections in front of the other person. And we receive forgiveness, understanding, and a chance to try again the next day.

This is also a good opportunity to air out any stewing annoyances or hurt feelings so that they don’t blow up in our faces in the long run.

If you’re having a hard time saying sorry, a note is a great way to do so. And there’s nothing a humble heart to break down a wall between two people.

Examples of words of humility:

  • I regret/I’m sorry for . . .
  • Next time, I’ll try to . . .
  • I could’ve done ___ better today . . .
  • You must have been (upset, confused, etc.) when I . . .

02. Gratitude & Appreciation

Nothing fills me up more than hearing my husband notice all the little things I do for him. Whether he sends me a quick thank you text for the delicious lunch I made, or he lists all the actions he appreciates during “Three Things,” his thankfulness shows me that he doesn’t take me for granted. Simple heartfelt gratitude gives extra meaning and purpose to our daily actions.

Be specific. It’s a wonderful gift to show the other person how much you care about his or her unique role in your life. In addition to your significant other, this also applies to your parents, friends, and colleagues.

Examples of words of appreciation:

  • I appreciate that you . . .
  • I couldn’t ___ today if it weren’t for you . . .
  • I am thankful that you . . .
  • I’m glad to have you as my (mom, sister, friend, etc.) because . . .

03. Encouragement

Apart from being the lifestyle editor for Verily, I’m also a wife and mother. Needless to say, there are a lot of areas in my life where I have opportunities to fall short. Even on days when I feel most successful, I question whether I could have done this or that better. My husband puts my self-doubts at ease when he tells me how much he believes in me and my abilities. 

He knows that the middle of the day is the craziest time for me. After all, I’ve been with the kids all morning, trying to balance work, errands, and my sanity. So he usually gives me a quick call to ask how I’m doing and to offer a few words of motivation. A simple «You’re a great mom.

You’re so patient, and the kids love you so much!» is enough to convince me that I have everything I need to conquer another dirty diaper and food strewn all over the floor.

Who knew that taking a minute to give someone a little encouragement could change a person’s entire attitude for the rest of the day?

Examples of words of encouragement:

  • I believe in you because . . .
  • It impressed me when you . . .
  • The good news is . . .
  • When you need something to lift your spirits, just remember that . . .

04. Empathy

My husband struggles with empathy. Many of us do unless we’ve been in another person’s shoes. Words of affirmation are a way for me to know that I am understood.

It’s comforting for me to have someone to experience my struggles with. When my husband tells me that he recognizes my sacrifices and sufferings, I feel closer to him.

I feel someone is helping me carry the weight on my shoulders.

A great way to empathize with someone’s emotions, even if you don’t quite understand them, is to reflect on what they may be feeling or thinking. Paraphrase what you can tell they might be going through.

Examples of words of empathy:

  • It must be really tough that you . . .
  • I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you to . . .
  • That sounds . . . Is that right?
  • I could see how you would feel that way because . . .

05. Respect & Admiration

Whenever my husband and I ask couples for their secrets to a long and happy marriage, respect is among the top three answers. We may respect and admire the people we love, but how often do we express it with words? When my husband builds me up with concrete reasons of why he respects me, I can’t help but feel loved.

In this way, it encourages me to stay true to myself, to grow, and to continue to follow my dreams and goals as an individual. It moves me to recognize the strengths I have that I may take for granted, especially in the throes of daily life.

It also reminds me of the complementary aspects of our personalities, as we often admire most in others what we tend to lack in ourselves.

Every day, my husband writes me a letter. Sometimes it’s on a sticky note, and sometimes it’s on two large pieces of paper. He hides it in my laptop or leaves it on the bathroom mirror.

In doing so, he never fails to make me feel honored, whether it’s noting how creative I am with the kids or admiring my ability to work late into the night. It encourages me to keep being the best version of myself that I can be.

And in turn, it helps me build him and our family up as well.

Show your loved one that you respect him or her by speaking politely and giving compliments. Be specific and sincere. When you do disagree on something, refrain from making judgmental statements.

Reach out by asking questions or offering to talk about it more instead. In the end, it’s OK to have differences.

As an act of love, words of affirmation should be focused on the other person, not on yourself.

Examples of words of respect:

  • Great job . . .
  • I’m so thankful to have you in my life because . . .
  • I wish I could ___ the way you do.
  • It makes me happy when you . . .
  • I’m proud of you for . . .

By now, you might be thinking, “Wow, you’re super needy.

” This is true. I need words of affirmation. I crave them. You may crave something else. If you aren’t sure what your or your loved one’s love language is, take the quiz here to find out.

 After reading the book, my husband and I knew what each other’s love language was—but we couldn’t apply them to our relationship overnight. It takes thoughtful conversations, continued practice, and loving feedback to learn how to “speak” one another’s language.

Even so, there’s always room for improvement. It’s a good thing we have the rest of our lives together to work on it.

Источник: https://verilymag.com/2015/08/five-love-languages-dr-gary-chapman-words-of-affirmation-marriage-preparation-romance-relationships

Ways to Use Words of Affirmation

How to Use Words of Affirmation in Your Relationship

Are you looking for ways to improve your relationships with others? Whether it be a romantic, familial, friendship, or work relationship, words of affirmation can be a great way to start. Keep reading to find several ways you can use words of affirmation in any relationship.

What are Words of Affirmation?

Have you ever heard of the 5 love languages? It is the thought that people show and receive love in different ways.

The love languages include physical touch, acts of service, words of affirmation, quality time, and gifts.

The idea behind love languages is that if you can find your love language (how you give and receive love), then you can connect more deeply and grow closer in your relationship.

Maybe you love to hug and cuddle with your partner, that would mean that your love language is physical touch.

Words of affirmation as a love language are any words, either spoken or written down, that make your partner feel good, supported, and uplifted.

Before we get into some examples of words of affirmation, let's first discuss how to know if your partner’s primary love language is words of affirmation. 

Is Your Partner’s Love Language Words of Affirmation?

Now that you know what words of affirmation are, how do you know if that is your partner’s primary love language? Let’s look below and see some examples: 

  • They love when you compliment them, their faces light up with joy. 
  • They get excited to read a text or email from you and respond as soon as they are able. 
  • They struggle with criticism. 
  • They get excited over handwritten notes or cards. 
  • They feel fulfilled when someone shares appreciation for them. 
  • They usually notice the small details about people’s lives, and can be good at reading others’ emotions. 

If you are still unsure, you can always ask. As they say, communication is key in a relationship. If you want to strengthen your relationship, then communicate with them and what they need from you (and what they can give to you in return). You can also take the 5 love languages quiz together to find out what your love languages are.

Why Do Some People Need Words of Affirmation?

To those who do not feel fulfillment from receiving a kind or supportive message, it may seem difficult to understand why others seem to need words of affirmation to feel uplifted. Words of affirmation can help build bonds and strengthen relationships if that is the person’s primary love language.

Everyone needs their emotional tank filled, and for many, sharing positive words fills theirs.

It is also important to note that people who crave words of affirmation do not respond well to harsh criticism that involves saying hurtful words (it isn’t kind to do this to anyone, but people whose love language is words of affirmation take those harsh words to the heart).  

Read more: Why Words of Affirmation are Such a Powerful Love Language

Ways to Show Words of Affirmation

Remember, when sharing words of affirmation, the person you are sharing with can tell if you aren’t being genuine. Be authentic with your words, let them come from the heart.

In a world where everyone is sharing their «perfect» lives on social media, authenticity is valued. Follow up with them through your actions, if you say you care about the person but act another way, then your words will do more harm than good.

It is also important to show your appreciation for the person. 

People who crave words of affirmation need to know that what they are doing is making a difference. Let them know you enjoyed the dinner they made, or how much you appreciated them folding your laundry.

Showing your appreciation through verbal affirmation can make a big impact, especially when it is genuine.

Now that we know what words of affirmation are, let’s dive in with different ways to convey words of affirmation with your partner, friend, family member, or even in the workplace.

Why is a Kudoboard a great way to show words of affirmation?

It’s a thoughtful and heartfelt way to show a loved one how much they’re cared about and appreciated! Learn more

Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With Your Partner

Now that you’ve determined your partner's love language is words of affirmation, how do you show them? There are many things you can say (I love you, I appreciate all you do for me, thank you for loving me). Instead of going over a long list of things you can say, read this list of different ways you can show your partner or spouse affection through positive words. 

  • A handwritten note sharing how much you appreciate and love your partner or spouse. Be specific as possible to achieve maximum results. 
  • A quick post-it sharing positive words left in their car or wallet, as a surprise to find later. This helps them feel loved and will guarantee a smile. 
  • Compliment them, and be specific! This will mean more if you share a genuine compliment with them about something other than their looks. Such as a certain quality that you admire about them.
  • Send a text to let them know you are thinking of them. This is especially thoughtful if you don’t normally text them throughout the day. 
  • Leave them a voicemail and let them know you can’t wait to see them. 
  • Send a love card using kudoboard. This will definitely get their attention and help them feel loved. 
  • Tell them you love them in front of other people. This helps them know that you value them and are proud to be their partner. 
  • Give them a card for a special occasion, and write down more than just “Love, (your name)” at the bottom. Really let them know how much you care about them through your words. 

Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With a Friend 

The 5 love languages don't just apply to romantic relationships. Love languages can also be used in friendships. If you want to really make your friends smile, and strengthen your friendship, sharing kind words with them is a great way to go.

  • Tell them you appreciate their friendship.
  • Compliment them on something other than their looks (their listening skills, how they can always find a way to brighten someone's day).
  • Send them a text sharing a fun memory you had together (bonus points if it includes a picture). This will help them know that you value the time you spend with them.
  • Give them a shout-out on social media. This shows that you are proud to be their friend.

Ways to Use Words of Affirmation With a Family Member

Family members also need to feel the love. Whether you get along with your family or not, it never hurts to share some kind words with them. Here are some ways to show words of affirmation to your loved ones. 

  • Acknowledge something special about them, how they can always make you laugh or know the right words to say to make you feel better. 
  • Thank them for always having your back, despite any family drama that may come up. 
  • Share words of gratitude with them. Take note of something they either do every day, or something that took a lot of work, and let them know how much you appreciate them.  
  • Let them know how much you admire them. 

Ways to Use Words of Affirmation In the Workplace

Finally, there are also many ways to show words of affirmation in the workplace. Letting your co-workers, boss, or employees know that you value them is a wonderful way to make the office a more positive environment.

If you are the boss, here are some ways you can show your employees how much you appreciate them. Performance reviews are always a great place to give positive and constructive feedback. However, positive words can be shared more often as well to keep morale up. For more ideas, check out this article on how to use words of affirmation as a boss. 

  • Give praise for their performance, this is especially meaningful when you are specific. 
  • Give praise for specific character traits, such as leadership skills. 
  • Let them know that they have a future in the company.

Bosses also need positive recognition! If you really appreciate your boss, let them know with these ideas. 

  • Thank them verbally for their hard work and leadership. 
  • Send them a group thank you card (Kudoboard makes this easy with Boss's Day cards!)
  • Acknowledge everything they do with a team effort Boss’s Day 
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