13 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce

13 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce

13 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce

It’s no secret that it takes work to protect, nurture, and grow a marriage. Between work schedules, children, and other obligations, sometimes it can seem impossible to maintain that partnership. And when problems arise, for some couples it’s healthier to divorce and go your separate ways, while for others, it’s a better choice to work on your relationship.

If you want to stay with your partner but navigate the bumps in the road, there are proactive measures—from improving communication to infusing more romance in day-to-day life—you can take to prevent divorce. Here are 13 ways to improve your partnership.

Rule Out the Idea of Divorce

Just toying with the idea that you might be better off outside of the marriage can put a major strain on the relationship, even if you never voice those thoughts.

In fact, that thought alone can cause a major break in your motivation to make the marriage better. To combat this risk to your marriage, decide ahead of time that divorce is not an option.

Making this commitment will help you focus on how you can make the marriage better and stronger, rather than thinking about what life might be outside the marriage.

Honor and Respect Your Partner

People inevitably change over time and understanding, appreciating, and adapting to those changes is critical. To help remind yourself of the wonderful person you married, make a list of their best qualities. This exercise will help you remember why you fell in love in the first place. It also helps to vocalize how much you appreciate your partner’s quirks and eccentricities.

Let your partner know every day—through compliments or thank yous—that you appreciate all that he or she does.

These little expressions are deposits in the bank. You don’t want to make withdrawals from your marriage without ever making any deposits. So, be sure you are doing things that honor your partner for who he or she is.

Communicate Regularly

In the age of smartphones, Netflix, and work-from-home lifestyles, it’s easy to get distracted and go days without having a real conversation with your spouse.

Communicating openly about your life, interests, dreams, frustrations, and feelings is an important way to foster intimacy in a relationship. wise, it’s crucial that you listen to your partner voice his or her thoughts, too.

Sometimes it’s helpful to set aside 30 minutes each day without interruptions where you can talk without any distractions.

Share Financial Expectations and Budgets

Many marriages are fraught with disagreements over finances. Often couples bring different expectations about money to a relationship and find it difficult to see the other person’s perspective. Coming to an agreement on how to handle money together is a critical component of successful marriages. Agree on a budget and an approach to debt and then live within your limits.

For some, it’s important to differentiate between a need and a want. While both are legitimate, couples face problems if they try to fulfill all their wants without considering their budget. wise, it’s important to incorporate some flexibility in your budget to allow for entertainment, gifts, vacations, and other activities that help strengthen the marriage.

Give Each Other Space

One of the hardest things to balance in a marriage is the right amount of time to spend together. Too much can feel smothering while too little can be interpreted as inattentive. So, when your partner needs space or a night out with friends, offer to watch the kids or run the errands so they can easily get that time.

It’s also important that you make time to spend with your partner. If babysitting issues or financial constraints make that difficult, plan a fun, cost-effective date night at home. The key is that you both are making a concerted effort to spend quality time together but allowing one another the space to have an outside community as well.

Ditch the Sweatpants

It’s easy to get into a routine of being overly casual, especially if you’ve been with your partner for many years. But an easy way to rekindle romance is to think back to those early days of dating—preparing for date night with an at-home manicure, getting a fresh shave and haircut, or choosing a fun outfit.

And while that may sound superficial, there are other ways to remind yourself just how attractive and energized you are. Keeping up with your physical fitness boosts confidence and well-being, and can double as a way to spend time with your partner, whether it’s taking a new workout class, training for a 5K, or prepping healthy meals together on Sundays.

Keep Up the Courting

Another way to keep the flame burning in a marriage is to continue courting your spouse.8 Make time for a date night every week, even if it’s to get ice cream or cook a new recipe together. If money is a concern, trade babysitting with another couple, or put the baby in a stroller and walk around the mall or go to the park.

It also helps to continue doing the things you did when you were dating. Leave your partner little love notes where he or she will find them. Make them coffee in the morning. Buy their favorite snack at the grocery store. Many couples report that these types of small gestures help them feel newlyweds.

Forgive Quickly

Often marriages begin to fall apart when one person holds a grudge. In fact, research has shown that feeling contempt toward your partner almost always festers and can lead to divorce if it’s never resolved. As a result, try to forgive your partner as quickly as possible.

Remember that forgiveness is just as much a gift you give yourself. Holding a grudge takes up mental and emotional space and almost always impacts your health and stress levels. Opt for a forgiving spirit and reap the positive benefits, which range from better sleep to stress relief.

And, if you have wronged your partner in some way, be sure to sincerely apologize and ask for forgiveness. Truly listen to what your partner has to say and why he or she is upset to understand how to do things differently in the future.

Don’t Try to Control Your Partner

Give your spouse room to be the person he or she is and learn to collaborate on decisions. In healthy marriages, both partners have mutual respect for one another and don’t demand their own way.

They also give their spouse the freedom to come and go without having to ask permission. They don’t monitor or control one another.

Be sure you’re collaborating with your partner on any big decisions, from spending to raising children.

Partners who try to control one another often become emotionally abusive or display signs of financial abuse, which frequently leads to divorce.

Get Help Before It’s Too Late

If you’re still having challenges or you fear that divorce might be imminent, consider counseling or couples therapy.

Often your or your partner’s workplace will have access to an employee assistance program (EAP), where you can receive some initial help or get a referral.

You also could consider meeting with a trusted religious leader if you share faith and then move beyond that if needed.

A Word From Verywell

Navigating issues in a marriage can be extremely challenging. In order to persevere and to prevent divorce, it takes both partners to do the work and put in the time.

And while the goal is to save the relationship, ultimately, you have to decide if staying together is the right choice for you.

If you’re unsure what to do, talk to loved ones or a therapist who can help you better understand your situation.

Источник: https://cityanddale.com/13-ways-to-strengthen-a-marriage-and-avoid-divorce/

20 Things a Couple Can Do to Strengthen a Marriage

13 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce

Marriage requires a lot of understanding on the part of both spouses and a certain degree of compromises too. 

You need to accommodate some s, diss, and lifestyles of your partner while expecting them to reciprocate. 

If you are feeling your marriage is not where you want it to be, there are many things you can start to do right now that can contribute to the improving relationship with your spouse.

This article shares time-tested and proven ways for strengthening marriages against storms of life.

What constitutes a strong foundation for a marriage?

To strengthen a marriage couples need to ensure that they nurture their relationship from the beginning. Marriage is a rewarding experience especially for those who built a strong foundation of their relationship.

Listed below are 4 principles essential for building a strong foundation for a marriage:

1. Commitment

Commitment is the part of the relationship that provides safety and security, so couples can express their thoughts, feelings, and desires openly. 

The commitment you make to your partner to be their other half in life is a huge one.

There’s a goal of permanence and solidity between you when you announce commitment in a relationship

A key sign of a committed relationship is in being the person your partner needs on any given day.

If you need to be the strong one, be the strong one. If your partner feels needy, show up and give them what they need.

Be faithful, be consistent, and be somebody that your partner can rely on to keep your word.

2. Communication

Communication is the key to a happy and prosperous relationship. It is a very important part, especially where love is involved. 

It is the act of conveying meanings from one entity or group to another through the use of mutually understood signs, symbols, and semiotic rules. 

Relationship communication skills don’t come easy for everyone. Some couples will have to work on their techniques for years. But over time, they will be able to speak openly and honestly with one another.

3. Patience

Well, patience is the ability to tolerate or restrain yourself from reacting in anger or frustration.

Patience in marriage is fundamental for your relationship to flourish. To such an extent, that it’s one of the significant marriage skills. 

Patience brings a sense of contentment to the family. If both the partners patiently listen to each other or to their children, there are higher chances of the family life to continue with stability.

4. Intimacy

Intimacy involves the expression of our most profound, and most vulnerable parts of ourselves, which includes our deepest hopes, fears, dreams, thoughts, feelings, and pain.  These sensitive feelings are tough to express.

Real intimacy is vital to strengthen a marriage and keep it thriving. Without it, marriages may morph into routine, roommate- living situations, which is hardly satisfying for either partner.

The need for intimacy in marriage is as important as the need for love and trust to build a healthy and fulfilling relationship.

Related Reading:Emotional Intimacy vs Physical Intimacy: Why We Need Both

20 ways to strengthen a marriage

With the current divorce rate between 40-50%, many couples are in search of ways to strengthening their marriage. With this fact in mind and in hopes of decreasing this rate, we offer the following 10 suggestions below for strengthening a marriage.

1. Rid off the relationships in your life that are “toxic”

 A toxic relationship is one that demands more than it gives. These types of relationships can be with family members, friends, and/or others we deal with on a regular basis. Do what it takes to end relationships that are no longer beneficial to you or your marriage with your spouse.

2. Work together as a team instead of competing with one another

Life is a rat race and none of us are going to get out alive, therefore, it is best to face life’s challenges as a team instead of competing to see who can handle difficult situations better or more often.

You can also try couples strengthening exercises to become a better team.

3. Encourage and uplift your spouse regularly

To have a strong marriage, it is first necessary for your spouse to feel good about themselves. The old saying goes; “One cannot love another without first loving thyself.” 

Be sure to remind your spouse how important they are to you and tell him, or her, how they make your life easier and happier.

4. Perform kind gestures for your spouse

We all love to be pampered and/or spoiled by our loved ones and one of the best ways to show someone you care is to do something thoughtful. 

To strengthen a marriage, Consider picking up your spouse’s favorite movie, snack, and a bunch of flowers – just because it would matter to them and make you happy too.

5. Enjoy alone time

As human beings, spending time alone is a necessity for achieving peace and clarity. Spend plenty of time with your spouse but don’t forget to take time out for yourself as well.

6. Adopt a pet

Pets are known for bringing happiness to a home and can even help strengthening your marriage. Consider adopting a cat or dog from your local shelter. This will provide a fun opportunity for picking out a name for your new pet and taking him, or her, out to play.

7. Plan a date night either once a week or a month

A date night can be as simple as having dinner at a local diner, a picnic, or going on a short walk at your favorite place during the weekend. 

Not only will this help to strengthen a marriage but also solidify a friendship as partners. Eventually, it will become an activity that you both look forward to.

8. Make plans that suit both spouses in the relationship

Oftentimes in a marriage, spouses tend to enjoy different activities from one another. The husband may prefer a round of golf while the wife enjoys the day at the salon. 

Try finding out what your partner enjoys and try participating in the same – your partner will appreciate the gesture and do the same for you next time.

9. Spice things up in the bedroom

A “happy sex life” is ultimately an underlying key for the success of any marriage. Both partners must be fully satisfied in the bedroom and it is great to try new things or “spice things up.” 

Consider visiting a local adult store or perhaps shopping online (for those who are more shy) for new lingerie and/or a sexual game to play with your spouse.

10. Have meaningful and open conversations with your spouse

Build upon your communication skills by allotting a set time for open discussions. During this time, nothing is off-limits and both spouses agree to only use words that are kind and never insulting; neither person can get mad, angry, or upset. 

If this were to occur, the conversation should be closed and revisited during the next set time.

Related Reading:Conversations Every Couple Needs to Have for a Better Marriage

Also watch: How to skip the small talk and connect with anyone.

11. Don’t stress about the little things

Regardless of how much you and your partner love each other, you would find yourself bickering and arguing about some silly and inconsequential things.

Stressing about little things that hardly matter is not a good practice and usually emerges in a relationship from either partner’s obsession with those little things.

The results from a study showed that both husband’s and wives’ experience of total daily stress was associated with greater same-day marital conflict and that conflict was greater on days both spouses experienced high levels of stress.

Letting go of excessive stress is one of the best ways to strengthen a marriage.

12. Reminisce together

Reminiscing together can help the two of you reconnect and remember why you fell in love. Build that nostalgia into your future activities and the emotional attachment can reform. 

Reminiscing about the good times is one of the best ways to bring romance back into a relationship and strengthen a marriage.

13. Take responsibility for your actions

You don’t want to be in a relationship where one partner is always looking down and feeling sorry for another. It makes more sense to acknowledge your faults and ask for help from your partner.

14. Leave the past in the past

If something happened many years ago, don’t bring it up now. Rather stick to the topic at hand. An essential part of any marriage is being able to forgive each other and move on.

To strengthen a marriage you need to focus more on the present and not be bogged down by the instances in the past.

15. Have fun

Life can be challenging, demanding, busy and I could keep going on and on about the difficulties it brings us sometimes.  Despite this, or better yet in spite of this, it’s important to create the time and space in your relationship to have fun. 

16. Show unconditional positive regard

Show unconditional positive regard for your partner so they know that your love for them is not dependent on circumstances. This allows your partner to feel safe to share anything with you, even if they know you will not it.

17. Talk about sex

Don’t just have sex but have conversations about it. Talk about patterns, s, diss, desires, fantasies, etc. Couples who have discussions about intimate topics are more ly to be healthier, happier, and last longer.

A study found a clear association between the use of sexual terms, particularly slang terms, and relationship satisfaction and closeness. 

18. Accommodate each other’s needs

Always be flexible; change occurs in every relationship. Accept that you can’t always have things your way, things are not going to always go as planned, or how you want them to go.

19. Learn how to manage conflict

There are some conflicts you may not ever resolve, but you can learn to manage them by coming up with agreeable solutions, compromising, agreeing to disagree, and letting go.

20. Love yourself

For successful relationships, you must love yourself first before you love another. You cannot give what you do not have. Be mindful of how you spend your time, Care about your diet, and Cut off toxic people.

Related Reading:Practicing Positive Self Care in Your Marriage

Conclusion

To strengthen a marriage the development of many skills are required – communication skills, emotional intelligence, planning, problem-solving, negotiation, resourcefulness, reliability, and parenting skills. 

When all of these elements are combined what you get is a profound connection. 

Try these tips and work your best to strengthen a marriage and forge a bond with your partner that can not break easily.

Источник: https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/things-couple-can-do-to-strengthen-a-marriage/

7 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce

13 Ways to Strengthen a Marriage and Avoid Divorce
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Being in a loving marriage is one of the most satisfying things you can do in life. Not only does it fill your days with passion, laughter, and security, but it can also improve your health. Yet, many couples who get married do not stay “until death do us part”. 

It is estimated that between 35-45 percent of married couples will end up divorced. While this is nowhere near the staggering 50/50 ratio we once thought it was, it still isn’t a comforting statistic for those of us who are married.

There are many challenges that can create troubles within the marriage. Infidelity, financial troubles, the stress of raising children, working, and simply not having enough quality time together can all affect your happiness. 

Don’t let your marriage become another statistic – be the one that lasts!

1. Talk Regularly

If you and your partner know how to communicate, then you are already ahead in the marriage game!

Communication will help you and your spouse learn how to view each other as teammates. It will deepen your marital friendships and improve your ability to solve problems without anger overwhelming you

Studies show that couples experience more fulfilling relationships when they trust one another fully. The more you communicate with your partner, the more you build that precious trust. This will allow you to feel safe and secure in your relationship.

Healthy communication between partners has been proven to boost relationship satisfaction, sexual satisfaction, and increased orgasm frequency in women. If those aren’t three great reasons to get talking, we don’t know what is!

2. Have a Regular Date Night

Research done by The National Marriage Project shows the many, many benefits of having a regular date night. Such benefits include:

  • Boosted sexual satisfaction
  • Reduce marital boredom
  • Better communication skills
  • De-stress
  • Less ly to get divorced

Couples experience a significant decline in stress when they are spending quality time together. Doing what? Anything! Folding laundry, having a date night, or being intimate all fall under the umbrella of spending quality time together so long as you are talking and enjoying one another’s company.

3. Take a Marriage Course

Your marriage does not have to be in trouble for you and your partner to benefit from taking a relationship course.

You can take an online marriage course at home together. No counselor or awkward admissions to a stranger. Just you and your spouse curled up together take different courses that will no doubt help you draw closer.

An online marriage course will teach you and your spouse how to be compassionate, boost intimacy, create traditions and goals together as a family, and boost the all-important communication in your marriage.

4. Banish the Option of Divorce

One way you can remove the threat of divorce from your marriage is by banishing the mention of it.

Have you ever been in an intense argument with your spouse and uttered the words: “Why don’t we just break up then!”

You don’t mean these words, but you use them to hurt your spouse or to try and show them how serious you are about the issue at hand.

Even on a subconscious level, having the option of leaving the relationship can be damaging to your relationship.

Banish any thoughts or speech about divorce and seek to work through your problems, instead.

5. Take Care of Yourself

When your spouse first met you, you probably had a wide variety of hobbies and social activities that you loved to participate in. Now that you’ve been married for some time, some of these habits may have fallen away.

Do yourself, and your marriage, a favor by taking up the hobbies and activities that used to make you happy.

Another great way to take care of yourself is to exercise regularly and do things that make you feel good about your physical appearance. Dress up, make yourself smell good, and maintain a healthy diet. When you look and good, you boost your confidence which you take into your relationship.

6. Forgive Freely

Research suggests that one of the biggest traits that contribute to a successful marriage is adaptability.

Marriage is not always going to go your way. There will be surprises and bumps along your road to happiness, but you must learn to be adaptable in order to succeed.

The longer you are together, the more ly it is that you are going to hurt each other’s feelings. Whether it is accidental or intentional, use these moments as opportunities to grow. 

If you said something hurtful during an argument, use it as an encouragement to learn how to communicate and solve your problems as a team. If there has been a betrayal in your marriage, practice forgiveness.

Forgiveness does not make you weak. Quite the opposite, it makes you stronger both as an individual and in your marriage.

7. Make Time for Sex

Not only is sex fun, but it is also an important way that you connect with your partner.

When you are intimate with your partner, you are boosting levels of trust between you. 

There are many other benefits to being sexually intimate with your partner. For one thing, the oxytocin released during lovemaking has been proven to deepen your bond and increase emotional intimacy. An active sex life has also been proven to reduce anxiety, boost monogamy, and improve your health.

The divorce rate can be a daunting figure for couples, especially those who are getting married. In order to combat divorce, couples must communicate regularly, spend quality time together, and focus on boosting intimacy. With love and patience, you and your partner can get through any bumps in the road of marriage.

Источник: https://foreverymom.com/mom-gold/7-ways-strengthen-marriage-avoid-divorce/

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